Sunday, August 10, 2008

Movie Review

If you haven’t seen The Dark Knight yet, then wtf are you waiting for? The plot is a little convoluted if you’re not a Batman fan, but can be followed. Too bad Heath Ledger was dumb enough to take all those pills; it would’ve been nice to see him do a sequel.

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Fuzzbusters

Everyone knows what a fuzzbuster is right? It’s a nickname for a radar detector. Anyway, I was reading an article in Newsweek recently that talked about how sophisticated and diverse radar detectors were becoming.

Radar detectors are now not only detecting radar, but some of them are also detecting photo-enforcement areas. (Those are those areas where the local law enforcement have camera taking pictures of your license plate incase you do something wrong). Some of the more sophisticated models will warn you if you are when you are approaching such areas so you don’t try to run red lights. Other units have databases that will warn you if you are approaching “high risk” areas, places where accidents frequently occur. Finally, and this really twists my testes, there are those that will also warn you if an emergency vehicle is nearby, or when you are in a school zone!

Are they fucking kidding me? Here’s how you tell if you’re entering a school zone – pay attention to the fucking signs!! I haven’t entered a school zone yet that didn’t have a four-foot high sign announcing the fact. As far as detecting emergency vehicles, don’t the fucking sirens give it away? How about people stop talking on their cell phones or worrying about what XM the want, and stop buying and using stupid, unnecessary toys and pay attention to what’s going on around them while their driving.

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Work Dress Code

My company has a pretty liberal dress code, we can wear jeans every day if we choose, sneakers, they have shorts & t-shirts days, etc. One thing that’s not allowed, unless it’s a designated day are hooded sweatshirts. Presumably this is because they do not lend to a professional look.

Having said that, our company is also the type that likes to crank the air conditioning to levels that would be better suited to chilling beer. To allow the women (and sorry ladies, y’all are always the one who are cold) to keep warm, the company allows people to keep and wrap themselves with blankets. One person even has a purple bathrobe she keeps at her desk. It just occurred to me recently, how does allowing people to wear bathrobes or wrap themselves up like a reservation Indian sitting in front of a cigar store look professional? Why not just allow sweatshirts, hooded or not?

Or is it just me who thinks this is a silly rule?

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White Guys Dressing Badly

I recently saw a 40-year oldish white guy in my local Wawa (and we all know Wawa is an Indian word for “sells lots of coffee and cigarettes”) who was wearing black sneakers, black nylon socks, tan shorts, sleeveless t-shirt, baseball hat on backwards, Blues Brothers sunglasses, a 2-day growth of beard, AND he had no chest to speak of with a beer belly. He thought he was a hip urban dude and had it going on.

The things you see when you don’t have low yield nuclear device.

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This ends the entertainment portion of your day. Now get back to work.

Monday, July 7, 2008

At the Movies

If you haven’t already gone to see it, go see Get Smart. Now. Without delay.

It is hilarious and best of all, it has Anne Hathaway in it, and she is an absolute hot-tay.

The best thing about it is the fact that Steve Carrell didn’t try to play Maxwell Smart like Don Adams.

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From the “I can’t see how this idea will be a problem” files

The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, in all of its infinite wisdom, is now issuing license plates to those who request them with the slogan, Choose Life, printed across the bottom.

According to the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles, that is) this is allowed because the Right to Life organization is registered as a non-profit organization. The DMV further states that the Right to Choose people (or whatever their organization is named) is also registered as a non-profit group and is working on their slogan for a license plate.

Yeah. You can see this idea going to hell in a handbasket in a fucking hurry, can’t you?

First, given how psychotic the RTL (Right to Life) people are, can’t you just see one of those nuts pulling out a gun on highway and taking a few shots at someone who has a “Right to Choose” plate?

And, can’t you just see one of these other great alternative organizations like say, oh I don’t know, the freaking KKK suing the state so THEY can have their own little slogan on a license plate? Although I do have to admit that thinking of those possibilities is amusing. Maybe Bill from Long Island or DCV in Longmont or some of you can think of some.

Maybe it’s not such a bad idea after all. If we can get enough of these idiots to wear their politics on their license plates, it might thin out the herd. Or at least traffic.

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Gay Marriage…again

You know its election time when the subject of gay marriage becomes a Presidential election issue.

Why do we have to go though this election after election, year after year? And why we have to make laws about it? Are there any laws prohibiting gay (or if you want to be politically correct same-sex) marriages?

No. What we have, and what the right wing Neanderthals use as a club, is that in the Old Testament of the Bible (which we all know is NEVER wrong), that says the only true union is between a man and a woman. Do you know why it says that? Because when the Old Testament was written (and it was written by Jews btw), the human race was only 3 days removed from swinging in the fucking tress like a goddamn monkey and we were running around boinking goats, monkey and other assorted freaking mammals!!! The religious people in charge were looking around going, “Oy Vey, something has to be done about this!”, and the next thing you know, BAM…the Old Testament is saying that only men and women can be married.

Let’s just make it simple. Let gays get married. Why should the heterosexuals be the only ones miserable?

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My Blog Profile

It has been brought to my attention by Joe from the gas station, that in my profile I mention my interests are my daughter’s softball team and staying out of trouble. He graciously pointed out that watching a girl’s softball team and staying out of trouble is giving people like himself too much fodder to use against me. I’m afraid he is correct. These statements should NOT and NEVER be used in the same sentence or paragraph together.

Of course only a perverted butthead would make something innocent like that perveted, but, alas, that why I like Joe.

And it would be nice if he got his lazy ass in gear and wrote Hisblog for a change.

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Ed Cahoon…please pick up the courtesy phone. Ed Cahoon, please pick up the courtesy phone…and send me your e-mail address!

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This ends the entertainment portion of your day. GTF back to work.